Kelly (K-L-Lord)

Username: azenethcardiel

What was liked about your story: The opening. Nothing much yet. . .

What wasn't liked about it (something you could work on):

• Short chapters.

• Little description.

Plot Cohesion

Does the plot make sense?

Not yet

Were the chapters eventful and full of information?

A little

Setting

Did you know where the scenes were taking place at all times?

Yes

Vivid Description

Did you feel as if the scene was coming to life?

Yes

Were the five senses involved? If yes, how?

Not really

Characters

Did the characters feel important?

Yes

Could you distinguish the difference between the characters? If no, why not?

Yes

Was there a clear antagonist and protagonist?

Not yet

Dialogue

Was all of the dialogue necessary, or did it seem as if they were just trying to fill up the page?

All the dialogues were necessary. The problem was there was little discription in between dialogues. How did Alaia feel when she first saw the man who was her father, what was she thinking? How about when he demanded about his daughter? Did she think he was referring to her, or her other sisters, or perhaps a sibling they've never met before? How did the supposed father look like?. . . etc

Was the dialogue easy to follow? If no, why?

Yes, a little

Did the dialogue give you any insight to anything in the story? (i.e: thoughts, personal feelings, foreshadowing)

Yeah, not much

Grammar & Organization

Were there a lot of errors/mistakes? If yes, please specify your answer.

No

Were the chapters hard, or easy to read? If hard, please specify your answer.

Easy

Was there enough punctuation, and was it used correctly? If no, please specify your answer.

There were some punctuation error.

Were there words used in the incorrect context? If yes, please elaborate to the best of your ability.

No

Your punctuation rated between 1-10?

7

Your grammar rated between 1-10?

8

Your vocabulary rated between 1-10?

5

Your Partner's Personal Critique:

I think each chapter's need more information. Feel it up is what I'm saying. Like the first chapter, the first paragraph talked about how she feels like she's been watched, and then the second paragraph, she tells us it's the day she finished highschool - but it didn't feel like it. Each chapter needs more accurate description.

Recommendation:

Yes, I would definitely recommend it to others.

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Username: lit-on-fire

What was liked about your story: This story is amazing, I can’t wait to read more. I added it to my library because it’s just great.

What wasn't liked about it (something you could work on): I have no complaints about this story.

Plot Cohesion

Does the plot make sense?

Yes, the plot is great so far.

Were the chapters eventful and full of information?

Yes, I like how there’s humor in every chapter.

Setting

Did you know where the scenes were taking place at all times?

Yes, it’s easy to follow because the story is very descriptive.

Vivid Description

Did you feel as if the scene was coming to life? Yes, with so much description it was like you’re seeing a movie in your head.

Were the five senses involved? If yes, how?

Yes they were involved. Like in one of the scenes the main character was eating, and she described the foods taste.

Characters

Did the characters feel important?

Yes, the characters did feel important. You can feel which ones are the main characters.

Could you distinguish the difference between the characters? If no, why not? Yes

Was there a clear antagonist and protagonist?

Yes

Dialogue

Was all of the dialogue necessary, or did it seem as if they were just trying to fill up the page?

The dialogue was needed and it was great.

Was the dialogue easy to follow? If no, why?

Yes the dialogue was easy to follow and it was full of emotion.

Did the dialogue give you any insight to anything in the story? (i.e: thoughts, personal feelings, foreshadowing)

Yes it gives you feelings and thoughts and I thought that was so cool.

Grammar & Organization

Were there a lot of errors/mistakes? If yes, please specify your answer.

I didn’t see any errors.

Were the chapters hard, or easy to read? If hard, please specify your answer.

They were easy to read and easy to follow.

Was there enough punctuation, and was it used correctly? If no, please specify your answer.

Yes

Were there words used in the incorrect context? If yes, please elaborate to the best of your ability.

No, the grammar is good.

Your punctuation rated between 1-10?

10, I didn’t find errors

Your grammar rated between 1-10? 10

Your vocabulary rated between 1-10?

10

Your Partner's Personal Critique:

The whole thing was great, I am so hooked onto the story. The way that it’s descriptive and the humor it’s great. I love it.

Recommendation:

I would because it’s super good, anybody that likes wolf stories they would like this one. I just can’t get over how great it is and it only has a few chapters.